Lyrics
[Verse 1: Eminem] I was mindin' my business at the local arcade,
Tryin' to beat my high score on 'Pac-Man' when she made
A grand entrance in a leopard-print leotard and skates,
Tellin' me she’s been checkin' my horoscope and our fates
Are intertwined like a pretzel in a hot dog stand!
I said, "Lady, I’m just tryin' to eat my nachos, understand?"
She slapped the tray out my hand, called me a "dream-killer,"
Then she started dancin' like the zombie out of 'Thriller!'
In the middle of the mall! People are starin', I'm dyin'—
Inside! Because she just stole my wallet and my keys
And told the security guard I’m the one who’s got the fleas!
She’s a pro at the pivot, a master of the fake-out,
I’m already lookin' for the nearest fuckin' brake-out!
But then she winked and I forgot my own name for a sec,
Now I’m followin' this lunatic like a total train wreck!
[Verse 2: Kendrick Lamar] I was at the laundromat, mindin' my business, foldin' my briefs
When this vixen walks in, lookin’ like a goddess, holdin’ a leash—
Except there’s no dog, just a collar attached to a dude named Steve!
I said, "Damn, baby, that’s a hell of a way to make a nigga leave."
She looked at me and winked, her eyes were like two black holes
I shoulda known right then she was out to collect my soul.
Two days later, I’m in her condo, we’re eatin’ some Thai
She says, "Kenny, I love you," then stabs me in the thigh with a fry!
A soggy-ass french fry, then she starts laughin’ like a hyena
Told me she cheated on me with the whole defensive line of the Arena
Football League! I’m like, "Bitch, we met forty-eight hours ago!"
She said, "Time is a social construct, now get on the floor, Joe."
My name ain't Joe! She called me her "little chocolate pipsqueak"
Then she charged ten grand to my Amex for a vintage boutique!
I’m a king, I’m a prophet, I’m the voice of the generation
But this bitch got me doin’ her dishes in a state of desperation!
[Hook: Eminem] She’s playin’ a love game (She’s a pro!)
And I’m the sucker with the controller, don’t you know?
She’s got the cheat codes, the glitch, and the lag
She’s got my dignity stuffed inside a Gucci bag!
It’s a love game, and the bitch is undefeated
I gave her my heart and the motherfucker got deleted!
[Verse 3: Eminem] Now I’m back in the kitchen and she’s sharpenin’ a butcher knife
I asked for the butter, she said "I’m about to butter your life!"
Whatever the fuck that means, I’m terrified, I’m shakin’ in my boots
She found my stash of old love letters and she ripped 'em by the roots!
Then she called up Dre and told him I was retirin' to be a mime
I said, "Bitch, that’s a career-ender, you’ve crossed the line!"
She just smiled and handed me a cup of what I thought was tea
But it was just hot sauce and the tears of my family!
She’s a psycho, a cycle of misery, a beautiful disaster
I’m runnin’ away but she’s drivin’ the getaway car faster!
She’s got my passwords, my pins, and my social security card
She keyed "I’m with Stupid" into the grass in my front yard!
But every time I try to leave, she cooks a lasagna that’s divine
And I’m right back on the hook, lookin’ for a sign!
It’s a love game, and I’m the one who’s gettin’ played out
She’s the reason that my hair is fallin’ out and I’m grayed out!