The Legend of Nick

Verse 1

Bush track

Dust on my heels and the sun on my back

Thirsty

Nick brings the slab and the esky is packed

Tall guy

Stretching out shadows against the red clay

Six foot seven

Blocking out the heat of the day

Walking heavy

Dragging that anchor through the sand

He moves slow

Hardest working tripod in the land

Chorus

My mate Nick has a big dick

My mate Nick has a big dick

Yeah he wears it like a belt

Makes the ice in the cooler melt

Nick has a big dick

My mate Nick has a big dick

Verse 2

Strewth

He dropped his trousers by the creek

Water rose up

Birds started making a horrified shriek

Big meat

Swinging like a heavy pendulum clock

Thudding

Hitting on his kneecap like a rock

Scary

Needs a custom holster for his gear

Total unit

Biggest thing I've seen in twenty year

He's alright

Just don't let him stand too close

Taking up space

Giving everybody a double dose

Chorus

My mate Nick has a big dick

My mate Nick has a big dick

Yeah he wears it like a belt

Makes the ice in the cooler melt

Nick has a big dick

My mate Nick has a big dick

Bridge

Massive

He's massive

He's absolutely massive

Heavy

He's heavy

He's staying ready

Don't trip

Don't fall

He's got enough for us all

Verse 3

Wild

Running through the scrub like a beast

Feast

Enough for a wedding in the east

Pants rip

Struggling to keep the zipper tight

Cursing

Fighting with his denim every night

Absolute hog

Longer than a branch of silver gum

True blue

Beating like a rhythm on a drum

Look out

Coming through the gully with a load

Watch your head

Moving like a python on the road

Chorus

My mate Nick has a big dick

My mate Nick has a big dick

Yeah he wears it like a belt

Makes the ice in the cooler melt

Nick has a big dick

My mate Nick has a big dick

Outro

Nick

Big Nick

Huge Nick

He's got it

Yeah he's got it

Too much for the boys

Too much for the girls

Just Nick

And his massive

Club

Yeah