What’s the style strength you’re using?

Spoken Intro

They told us a teenage romance couldn't survive the changing winds of society.

But tonight, as a Category 3 hurricane ripped the roof off the local drive-in cinema…

I looked over at you in the passenger seat.

The dashboard flew away,

The steering wheel was gone,

but baby… not a single strand of your hair even vibrated.

And looking at your glorious, rock-solid bouffant, I just had to ask...

Intro

[Refrain] Shoo-wop, shoo-wop, ooh-wah Shoo-wop, shoo-wop, ooh-wah

Verse

We met down at the malt shop, sharing a cherry shake

Your hairdo was a mountain, frosted like a wedding cake

The ceiling fan was spinning, blowing the napkins 'round

But your golden, crunchy halo never tumbled to the ground

Chorus

Oh baby, what’s the style strength you’re using? (Ooh, tell me)

To keep my poor heart confusing (Shoop, shoop)

Is it a Level 5 Hold? Or maybe a 10?

Will you ever let me touch it? Tell me where, tell me when

Oh darling, it’s a scientific mystery

What’s the style strength you’re using on me??

[Refrain] Shoo-wop, shoo-wop, ooh-wah Shoo-wop, shoo-wop, ooh-wah

Verse

I leaned in for a cuddle beside the jukebox machine

You smelled of teenage passion, Aqua Net, and Brilliantine

I asked if you’d go steady, you gave a stiff little nod

Your bangs didn't even flutter -- oh baby, it’s an act of God

(Helmet of love) (Bop-bop-a-bop) (Sent from above) (Bop-bop-a-bop)

Chorus

Oh baby, what’s the style strength you’re using? (Ooh, tell me)

My mind is what I am losing! (Shoop, shoop)

Is it industrial grade? A military pour?

I’ve never loved a follicular fortress more

Oh darling, it’s a scientific mystery

What’s the style strength you’re using on me?

Bridge

"Last night at Lover’s Lane… the mood was right.

The moon was full.

I reached out to run my fingers romantically through your curls…

...

The doctor says my index finger is fractured in three places, Brenda!

It was like punching a brick wall covered in lacquer

But I don't care about the cast on my hand… I only care about the cast on your head!"

(Weedly-weedly-woo-waah)

Verse

Our love is highly flammable, so stay away from the fire!

You’re aerodynamic, baby, and taking me higher

I don't need a diamond ring to prove that you are mine,

I just need to see that aerosol shine

Outro

Tell me your secret! (Hold it tight, baby)

Extra firm hold! (Hold it right, baby)

Maximum volume! (In the night, baby)

Sticky to the touch! (Not too much, baby)

What's the style strength? (Ooh-ooooh)

Yeah, what's the style streeeeength?