Shamone Slim Shady

Intro - Eminem (spoken, irritated)

Yeah... they said "dream collab," I said "nightmare contract."

Fuck it. Here we go.

Verse 1 - Eminem

They threw me in the studio with the glitter glove king,

Now I'm stuck with this chimp, man, what the fuck I mean?

He moonwalkin' backwards while I'm tryna move forward,

Every take he doin' "hee-hee" like my patience gettin' ignored.

Gloves on, nose off, skin changin' like a chameleon,

I'm tryna spit fire, he tryna build a Neverland pavilion.

"Michael, please, just hit the beat, stop dancin' on the ceiling,"

He grabbin' my arm, doin' that Thriller shit, got me feelin'

Like I need a restraining order from a dead man walkin',

Billie Jean denyin' every bar that I'm talkin'.

I wrote the verse dark, he want it light and poppy,

Now the label smilin' while I'm ready to body this copy.

King of Pop? More like King of Drainin' My Last Fuck,

I'd rather battle my own mom again than get stuck in this truck.

sequins flyin', children cryin', cameras everywhere,

I just wanted to rap, now I'm in a tabloid nightmare!

Hook - Michael Jackson (smooth, high-pitched, melodic falsetto)

Ooh, hee-hee, why you so mad at me? (Shamone!)

We can rock with the stars, dance under the moon, baby.

Why you actin' so crazy? (Hee-hee!)

Stuck together, me and you, do the moonwalk, Slim, come through...

Beat it... beat it... but don't you leave it...

We gon' make history, just you wait and see it!

Verse 2 - Eminem

Man, this fool wants elephants in the booth, I want silence,

He's rehearsin' choreography while I'm losin' all my violence.

I'm Slim Shady, destroyer of worlds and careers,

He's Peter Pan in a diaper, cryin' over mirrors.

Every time I go dark, he flips it to some "Earth Song" shit,

I'm talkin' body bags, he talkin' 'bout stars and moonlit.

They locked the door, said "finish the record," no escape,

Now I'm writin' disses in the corner while he feeds the fuckin' ape.

Wacko Jacko got me trapped in this glitter hell,

My career flashin' before my eyes like a bad sequel.

I'd rather swallow eight miles of barbed wire than smile for the pic,

While he's doin' that spin, I'm plottin' how to end this quick.

Fuck your sequined jacket, fuck your one glove fashion,

I'd rather collab with my own addiction than this Jackson!

Hook - Michael Jackson (smooth, high-pitched, melodic falsetto)

Ooh, hee-hee, why you so mad at me? (Shamone!)

We can rock with the stars, dance under the moon, baby.

Why you actin' so crazy? (Hee-hee!)

Stuck together, me and you, do the moonwalk, Slim, come through...

Beat it... beat it... but don't you leave it...

We gon' make history, just you wait and see it!

Bridge - Eminem (getting more unhinged, speeding up)

I'm losin' my mind, this collab's a crime,

Hee-hee every two lines, I'm 'bout to commit one this time.

Take your Neverland dreams and your plastic face,

I'll see you in hell, right next to the Neverland case.

They forced this on me, now the world gon' laugh,

Eminem and Michael—worst pair since autographs!

Final Hook - Michael Jackson (fading out, still smooth but slightly off-key from Eminem's energy)

Ooh, hee-hee... why you so mad... at me?

We made magic... you'll see...

Shamone... moonwalk with me...

Outro - Eminem

...I'm never workin' with a dead legend again. Fuck.