Tux, Way To Soon

How much weight can one heart hold

Before it completely shatters?

I was hurried down on my knees

Drowning in the silence of losing mom

Trying to find a reason in the dark then

four days later

My phone buzzed and a text message changed everything that matters

Struck down on the blacktop

Stolen away in a flash

The house has never been this quiet before

Just empty spaces and two heavy shadows on the floor

Six years wasn't enough time with you

Tucks

It was a nightmare time and the worst it could be

And it tears me apart that I wasn't there to save you

To hold you or to look my baby boy in the eye last time

But if you had to leave me, buddy, I'm just glad

Mama was up there waiting to catch you

No more cars, no more paint run free

Toxic or on the meter

this one is for you, my boy in the sky

Six years of paw prints right by my side

Through the highest of peaks and the tears that I cried

Now I look at the front door where you used to wait

And it's just cold wood and a cruel twist of fate

I was already down on my knees from the pain

Staring at shadows, calling mama's name

Four days in the dark, trying hard to just breathe

And the phone lit up with what I couldn't believe

touch

Way too soon

Underneath a heavy broken moon

The silence is screaming your name

And nothing inside of this house feels the same

Two pieces of my heart torn away in a week

The grief is so loud that I can't even speak

But I hope mama's holding you tight by the hand

Waiting for me in a better land

Or maybe Neverland

Got the text on my screen and the world started spinnin'

How does loss keep on winnin' when I'm barely beginnin'

To process the first one?

Now my baby boy's gone

Hit by a car on a road, now I'm trapped in the dawn

Of a nightmare, it's the what-ifs and could-haves that mess with my head

Starin' at the screen, readin' what the text

I was miles away, dealing with another goodbye

And I couldn't even protect you, couldn't tell you not to die

Six years wasn't enough, it was stolen, it's cheap

Now I'm crying alone while the rest of the world is asleep

I picture your tuxedo coat, your energetic spark

But I swear on my life talks, your memory stays in the dark

You were more than a pet, you were a piece of my soul

The only thing keeping a broken

hole

The timing was a shadow, the timing was a thief

But love is still stronger than the worst of this grief

Oh, tux, tux, way too soon

broken moon

The silence is screaming your name

And nothing inside of this house feels the same

Two pieces of my heart torn away in a week

The grief is so loud that I can't even speak

But I hope mama's holding you tight

And giving you all the love that I could not

I couldn't lie

Six years of perfection

I'm sorry I wasn't there, Tux

I listened for your howls in the wind, buddy

Go running with my mama now

No more pain for either of you

Just peace and freedom

So I hope you're running around wild and free

When nighttime falls over the sky

I pray you're laying right there beside my mom

Keeping each other warm through the cold nights

As you both watch over me

I hope you know that I'll always love you

And you'll always be missed

My sweet baby boy

tux

There will always be a part of you here with me

You live on through your offsprings

And I've got two of your pups

So in a way you'll still be here with me

Even though you're physically gone

Part of your spirit lives in me and your baby