Iceberg Lettuce Disaster

Intro

Oh

Oh no

The rumbling has begun

Verse 1

Twenty-one days of this constant internal assault

Looking at my plate thinking it was all my fault

Crunchy green leaves looked so innocent and bright

Now I'm praying for the end in the middle of the night

Pre-Chorus

Doctor said the name and it sounded like a curse

Cyclospora parasite making everything much worse

I did not throw up

No nausea in my cup

Just a sudden frantic sprint to the bathroom stall

Chorus

Iceberg lettuce

You have broken my spirit and my soul

Liquid fire

Spraying deep into the porcelain bowl

Acute explosive misery for three weeks straight

I am losing weight and cursing my fate

Iceberg lettuce

Why did I believe you were a friend

Verse 2

I am tethered to the plumbing by a thread of fear

Cramping like a tidal wave whenever you are near

Simple wedge salad turned into a toxic bomb

Trying to stay calm while I'm losing all aplomb

Pre-Chorus

No stomach bile rising up to meet the air

Just a geyser of despair from the plumbing down there

I did not throw up

No nausea in my cup

Just the sound of splashing madness in the dark

Chorus

Iceberg lettuce

You have broken my spirit and my soul

Liquid fire

Spraying deep into the porcelain bowl

Acute explosive misery for three weeks straight

I am losing weight and cursing my fate

Iceberg lettuce

Why did I believe you were a friend

Bridge

Wash the leaves they said

Check the bag they said

I am a scientist of my own destruction

Tracing back the contamination

Every bite a calculation

Gone wrong

So wrong

Chorus

Iceberg lettuce

You have broken my spirit and my soul

Liquid fire

Spraying deep into the porcelain bowl

Acute explosive misery for three weeks straight

I am losing weight and cursing my fate

Iceberg lettuce

Why did I believe you were a friend

Iceberg lettuce

Will the liquid nightmare ever end