Selling Cookies to Women (Is Like Selling Crack to a Crackhead.)

Intro

(Screaming)

OH

OH

OHHHH

Verse 1

Think about it

Seven years old

Green sash

Standing on your porch

Looking at you

With those big

Pathetic eyes

You think they're innocent

They are the greatest

Sales force

Ever assembled

Chorus

Selling cookies to women

Is like selling crack

To a crackhead

They can't say no

The thin mints

The tagalongs

It's a fix

OHHHHH

Verse 2

The boys

The boy scouts

What have they got

Knots

They learn how to tie a knot

Who cares

What are they going to sell

To a man

To me

Magazines

The ones under the counter

Maybe some weed

Maybe a glock

Because nobody is buying

A merit badge

From a kid in shorts

Not me

Not today

Chorus

Selling cookies to women

Is like selling crack

To a crackhead

They can't say no

The thin mints

The tagalongs

It's a fix

OHHHHH

Bridge

Where is the money

Where did it go

Where is the flag

On the moon

They should have a colony

On Mars

By now

They could buy Greenland

Cash

They've got the loot

They've got the power

I want an audit

I want answers

OH

OH

OHHHHHH

Verse 3

I see them

At the grocery store

Waiting

Like sharks

Circling the frozen peas

You try to run

You try to hide

But you need

The shortbread

You crave

The coconut

It's a racket

A beautiful

Total

Racket

Chorus

Selling cookies to women

Is like selling crack

To a crackhead

They can't say no

The thin mints

The tagalongs

It's a fix

OHHHHH

Outro

Keep your cookies

Stay off my lawn

Get the boy scouts

Some ammo

OH

OH

OHHHHHH!