Lyrics
[Intro] [Spoken, tired and annoyed] Oh, you gotta be shittin' me.
Not him again.
Dude, lock the door.
[Verse 1] Ten o'clock on a Sunday morning
We were drinking lukewarm coffee on the porch
The damn flamingo in the yard gave a final warning
Then the lawn gnome ignited like a motherfucking torch
[Pre-Chorus] He’s back from the dirt
Smelling like fertilizer and primal hurt
He’s pointing a tiny pick-axe at my best friend
Wants this peaceful morning to end
[Chorus] He wants to turn Kyle into stone
The gnome's got a bone
He wants to turn Kyle into stone
And make the front yard his throne
The Prince of Porcelain has a debt to settle
'Cause he got kicked over by a foot of metal
He wants to turn Kyle into stone
[Post-Chorus] Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah
Kiss my ass, you gnome
Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah
[Verse 2] The clay-faced bastard bared his painted-on teeth
Screaming "Vengeance for the chipping of my hat!"
I grabbed the acoustic, but it was just out of reach
So I grabbed the weed-whacker instead of that
[Pre-Chorus] We’ll crack your ceramic face
Send you back to that garden-center place
Grab the super-soaker from the shed
Go fuck your own pointy head
[Chorus] He wants to turn Kyle into stone
The gnome's got a bone
He wants to turn Kyle into stone
And make the front yard his throne
The Prince of Porcelain has a debt to settle
'Cause he got kicked over by a foot of metal
He wants to turn Kyle into stone
[Bridge] Check the stance
Check the look
You came from a cheap-ass catalog book
Scream for mercy
Scream for grass
Scream like a little ceramic ass
Your rhymes are dumb
Your beard is fake
You're a mass-produced garden snake!
Your fishing pole is smaller than my big toe!
[Guitar Solo] [Chorus] He wants to turn Kyle into stone
The gnome's got a bone
He wants to turn Kyle into stone
And make the front yard his throne
The Prince of Porcelain has a debt to settle
'Cause he got kicked over by a foot of metal
He wants to turn Kyle into stone
### [Outro] Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah
He’s our doorstop now
Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah