Contradiction

[Intro: Creepy music box, faint ticking]

Another morning, another disguise,

Same tired expression, same half-open eyes.

The world keeps spinning, I'm stuck in my chair,

Everybody's talking, but nobody's there.

[Verse 1]

I brush my teeth, I get dressed, I go,

Say all the right things so nobody knows.

I laugh at the punchlines, I play along,

But somewhere inside me, the signal is gone.

I've got a hundred thoughts fighting for space,

And none of them know how to stay in their place.

I'm perfectly present, or so it appears,

I've mastered the art of disappearing for years.

[Pre-Chorus: The music box begins to distort]

And I don't know when the wires got crossed,

Or how many pieces of me I've lost.

I keep on waiting for something to click,

But every solution wears off just as quick.

[Chorus: Your original lyrics, unchanged]

I can hear mom knocking on the door.

Im still laying on the damn floor.

She asks if Im here.

Physically? Yeah.

Mentally? Where?

Feeling like a walking sack of flesh,

And then something happens, I feel fresh.

Can my life fix to one direction?

And stop being a fucking contradiction?

I'm so tired from the tugging and pulling,

Id give it away if I was willing.

But then someone else would have my burden,

And that makes my thoughts drunken.

[Verse 2: Heavy bass enters]

I get a good day, I start to believe,

Maybe there's something that I can achieve.

Then out of nowhere, the feeling wears thin,

And I'm right back to where I started again.

It's almost insulting, the way that I cope,

Building a ladder, then falling through hope.

I make myself laugh, I make myself smile,

Then wonder if I've been pretending awhile.

[Pre-Chorus: Ticking accelerates]

And I don't know which feeling to trust,

When every emotion turns into dust.

I want some quiet, I want some control,

I want to feel present inside of my soul.

[Chorus: Heavier guitars, sharper vocals]

I can hear mom knocking on the door.

Im still laying on the damn floor.

She asks if Im here.

Physically? Yeah.

Mentally? Where?

Feeling like a walking sack of flesh,

And then something happens, I feel fresh.

Can my life fix to one direction?

And stop being a fucking contradiction?

I'm so tired from the tugging and pulling,

Id give it away if I was willing.

But then someone else would have my burden,

And that makes my thoughts drunken.

[Bridge: Everything drops except the music box]

Maybe tomorrow I'll wake up alright,

Maybe my head won't pick another fight.

Maybe the silence will finally stay,

Maybe I'll figure myself out someday.

But the clock keeps ticking.

The walls don't move.

I'm searching for answers

I've got nothing to prove.

[Breakdown: Whispered, increasingly distorted]

Are you there?

Are you there?

ARE YOU THERE?

[Final Chorus: Full instrumental explosion]

I can hear mom knocking on the door.

Im still laying on the damn floor.

She asks if Im here.

Physically? Yeah.

Mentally? Where?

Feeling like a walking sack of flesh,

And then something happens, I feel fresh.

Can my life fix to one direction?

And stop being a fucking contradiction?

I'm so tired from the tugging and pulling,

Id give it away if I was willing.

But then someone else would have my burden,

And that makes my thoughts drunken.

[Outro: Music box slows to a stop]

Another morning.

Another disguise.

Physically here.

...

Mentally?

[Silence.]