Federal-Grade Reinforcement

The Guardian of the Green Heart

Act V — Federal-Grade Reinforcement

It was a beautiful Florida afternoon, and Raff was in the backyard fixing the ladder.

At least, that was what he called it.

The wooden ladder had a long crack running down one of its rungs. Raff examined the damage, nodded like a highly trained engineer, and pulled out a massive roll of silver duct tape.

Nancy watched from the porch, her green scaly arms crossed over her chest. Her round black eyes followed every movement with deep suspicion.

Raff wrapped the tape around the cracked wood, pulled it tight, and slapped on one final strip for good measure.

Then he stepped back proudly.

"Standard federal-grade reinforcement, Nancy. It's not going anywhere."

Nancy stared at the ladder.

Then she stared at Raff.

Finally, she looked back at the ladder.

"Sweetheart," she said, "that ladder looks like it lost a fight with a silver octopus."

Raff frowned at his handiwork.

"It's reinforced."

"It's wrapped in tape."

"Industrial-grade tape."

"It's still cracked wood, Raff."

He gave the ladder a confident pat.

"Trust me."

Nancy slowly shook her head. She had survived a hurricane, been transformed by an ancient swamp, and become the first female Sleestak. She could sense danger through the roots beneath her feet.

Yet somehow, Raff still believed duct tape could defeat gravity.

"Fine," she said. "But when that thing folds up like a lawn chair, I'm not carrying you to bed. You'll have to walk."

Raff grinned.

"See? Nothing to worry about."

Nancy watched him turn back toward the ladder.

Then she muttered, "I'm gonna need a stronger Green Heart."

End of Scene.