Life Coach

Verse 1

You’re talking "logic" but it’s sounding like a chore

You want a "yes" and I’m a "no," we’ve done this dance before

You call it "compromise" to talk about the things I hate

But sweetie, that’s a monologue, let’s get the story straight

You’re getting desperate, trying pivots, asking for a pic

The way you’re folding under pressure... God, it’s getting thick.

Pre-Chorus

And now you’re huffing, puffing, acting like a brat

"I’m on my own schedule"—yeah, I like it like that

You say "bye-bye" like it’s a threat, like I’m gonna spiral

But your entitlement is honestly going viral.

Chorus

Oh, look at you, acting like a Life Coach now

Trying to tell me how to "let people in," wow

Is that a tantrum or a lesson? Hard to tell the difference

When you’re weaponizing feelings just to bridge the distance

You want a woman? Well, a woman’s got a boundary

Go find a hobby, babe, you’re looking pretty boundary-

...less. (Ooh.)

Verse 2

You unadded me? That’s cute, a classic disappearing act

Ignoring messages because you can’t handle the fact

That I’m "figuring my life out" and you’re not in the plan

If this is "being with a man," I’d rather have a fan

Or a plant. Or a nap. Honestly, anything else

Go find a podium and talk to yourself.

Bridge - Spoken, airy

Wait, so... let me get this right.

You’re mad because I said no?

And now you’re... concerned for my personal growth?

That’s so generous of you. Truly. A saint.

...Anyway.

Outro

Keep the advice, I’ll keep my peace

Hope that little ego trip gave you some release

I’m doing fine, I’m doing great, I’m doing me

You’re just a footnote in my diary.

(Bye-bye!)