Jingle Bumps and Holiday Hiccups

[Intro - Both] Jolly chaos in the driveway, sleighs crashed into trash cans twice

Broken candy canes and wrapping, snowballs where the pies reside

Grandpa’s reindeer lawn inflatables deflated in a heap

Only thing more crooked is this Christmas after sleep

[Dusty-female voice] There’s tangle in the twinkle, reindeer hoof-prints on the cat

Eggnog in the blender and the blender’s in my hat

The carolers ran screaming at our wreath of questionable funk

It’s the holly-jolly circus, sit and laugh before we flunk

[Chorus - Both] So deck the halls with startled shouting

Fal-la-la-la-la-la-la-HOLY–

We’ve got stockings, we’ve got chaos

We’ve got babies times the tree

Raise a toast to unexpected blessings

Be they tiny, wild, or lumped…

Merry Christmas to the circus couple

Dusty… and her overachieving Stump

[Post-Chorus] Hey! Ho!

Oh no! (Oh my!)

Hey! Ho!

Triplets on the way, oh!

[Verse 2 - Dusty] Sweetheart don’t look so nervous, you’re the toast of ginger town

All the gnomes are betting money when the next will tumble down

Grandma’s wrapping diapers, Grandpa’s building fences fast

Guess you should’ve read the label—“Stub-sicle” outlasts!

[Pre-Chorus - Stumpy] Oh, cookies, I’m bewildered, how my candy cane performed

Thought I’d settled for a solo, now we’re triple-dose adorned

Sugar, if you tug my beard, will some more fall from the sky?

Having infants for the holidays—ho ho ho—oh my!

[Chorus - Both] So deck the halls with startled shouting

Fal-la-la-la-la-la-la-HOLY–

We’ve got stockings, we’ve got chaos

We’ve got babies times the tree

Raise a toast to unexpected blessings

Be they tiny, wild, or lumped…

Merry Christmas to the circus couple

Dusty… and her overachieving Stump

[Post-Chorus] Hey! Ho!

Oh no! (Oh my!)

Hey! Ho!

Triplets on the way, oh!

[Bridge - Stumpy] Guess we’ll need a bigger sled, and a barrel full of wipes

If one starts a-screaming, bet the others join the hype

Crib assembly is war, your dad’s stuck in the net

Hey, I’ll buy a manual if you promise not to fret

[Dusty-female voice & Backing Vocals] Christmas stockings hanging lower, like my patience and my eyes

But sugar, seeing triplets giggle—priceless holiday surprise

We’ll build a gingerbread fortress, and guard it night and noon

If the milk runs out at midnight, we’ll just holler at the moon

[Chorus - Both & Backing Vocals] So deck the halls with startled shouting

Fal-la-la-la-la-la-la-HOLY–

May your miracles be messy

Let the holidays erupt…

Merry Christmas from the juggling duo

Dusty… and her overachieving Stump