Geezer On The Train

What did I do yesterday? Well I'll tell you the truth

I survived a commute in the flourishing prime of my youth

Bought an overpriced latte and settled right into my seat

When a guy sat across from me, making the nightmare complete

Break

As I was scrolling through TikTok, absorbing the video's sound

While pretending to study a book I held upside down

And I couldn't deduce why he hadn't once blinked his eyes

As he drafted a sonnet and let out theatrical sighs

Break

But I kept on the job of ignoring this absolute pain

Swiping steadily onward to rot what was left of my brain

While no further than seven-foot-six from my horrified ear

Sat a self-proclaimed genius who smelled rather strongly of beer

I imagine he prayed that the loco would suddenly crash

So he'd pull me from danger and make a heroic, bold dash

But to open his mouth to say "hi" was beyond his own power

So he breathed through his mouth for the course of a torturous hour

Break

Well at last we pulled in, and as sharp as a digital beep

I got up and sprinted away from this absolute creep

And unless he remembers the girl looking bored on the train

In a second-class coach while he mentally wrote a refrain

He won't know I was rolling my eyes at him over

and over

and over

and over again, again and again.