The World of poops

Verse 1

I wake up in the morning, my gut starts to growl,

my stomach sings opera in C-sharp bowel.

I run to the bathroom with a scared little face,

'cause this ain't just a tiny fart about to take place.

Ladies and gentlemen, let the show begin,

today I pay tribute to the king of goofy sin.

No filter here, no cheap-ass poetry,

today we sing to poop, to butts, and to pee.

*_

Poops, butts, farts, pee,

that's the hit song of the country.

If you're grossed out, tough luck indeed,

this song is here to make you pee.

Poops, butts, farts, pee,

shout it loud and feel that glee.

Life is short, you gotta laugh,

with a little fart before your nap.[Chorus]

Verse 2

My butt has a life of its own, I swear to God,

sometimes it claps by itself and drops a little wad.

It's an expert trumpeter, symphonic little punk,

if the room goes silent, he's ready with the funk.

There are traitor farts, the ones that burn,

the quiet ones that sneak and make the room turn.

There are grandpa farts that sound like a truck,

and princess farts that smell like flowers... sike, they suck.

Spoken interlude

Cultural moment: Did you know that pee

turns grayish if you eat beets for tea?

And that a poop can float just like a boat

if you eat lots of fiber and some oats?

Science, my friends! Throne science!

Verse 3

In school they taught me this talk is rude,

but I say it's art, pure goofy mood.

Shakespeare wrote dramas, I write about turds,

we all got our topics and our silly words.

My dog rips ones that scare the neighbor dude,

my cat buries treasure with elegant mood.

My brother says "wasn't me" with a saintly face,

but the smell snitches him... it was his butt-case!

__

Poops, butts, farts, pee,

dance to it, I already did, see?

Shake that booty, lose control,

this jam's pure toilet rock 'n' roll.

Poops, butts, farts, pee,

in the bathroom or in Paris.

Doesn't matter where, let gas pass,

'cause laughter always beats the crass.[Chorus]

Verse 4

There are brave poops that refuse to come out,

you push and you push 'til you scream and you pout.

There are ninja poops that drop with no warning,

and shy little poops not into performing.

Morning pee is neon yellow bright,

looks like lemon Fanta with no fizz or bite.

If you hold it too long you do the potty dance,

cross your legs and pray, leave it up to chance.

_*

So now you know, don't act so prim,

we all take dumps, it's life's great hymn.

King or beggar, skinny or thick,

we all visit the same porcelain brick.

Raise your toilet paper like it's a mic,

and sing this chorus with me, real quick:

Poops, butts, farts, pee!

Poops, butts, farts, pee!

And if someone's offended by this little theme,

they can hold their fart... right in their mouth, supreme!