Hell

Oh I remember that one, that song

it's inside my brain

I had that same song on repeat

Same track and I can't sleep

Two in the morning and the cough syrup thick

Eyes fixed on the ceiling while my mind starts to slip

I been playing this shit all day

Same beat, no lyrics, just plays

I'm pacing through the kitchen with the lights off low

Talking to myself and I don't even know

It's like I'm watching me fall apart

Staring at a mirror with no soul

Just a man who wants to meet his end

My hands are shaking and my chest is tight

I hear that melody all through the night

I put the blade on the counter and I can count to ten

I ain't thinking straight again

This is it I said

This is how I am

cut and I cut and I watched it pour

Blood on the tile and shit on the floor

I fell to my knees and I prayed for more

Time but the clock don't work no more

I felt the pole creep up my spine

Closed my eyes and I crossed the line

I bled out slow on the kitchen floor

And I woke up somewhere I can't ignore

First thing I feel is the fire in my lungs

I open my mouth but I got no tongue

I try to scream and nothing comes

Just ash in my throat and burning gums

The grind is hot and my shit is stuck

I'm surrounded by the screaming and the fucking luck

Of a life I wasted and the soul I ducked

Man this place is real and I'm all fucked up

I see the faces of the ones I hurt

Every single scar and every dirty word

The air's thick and it smells like rot

I dropped to my knees and I lost the plot

I'm crying out for mercy and nobody hears

Just the crackle of the fire and my own damn tears

I beg and I beg till my throat goes raw

And the heat just bites like a monster's jaw

I feel it in my bones and my busted brain

This burn is permanent, the pain is plain

No ending to this sentence, no key to this cage

I'm breaking on the inside for age after age

I claw with the dirt and I dig in my skin

Just to feel something that ain't boiling in

But every touch is scorching, every breath is soothing

Crying like a baby with my guts all shook

I keep reliving that night in my head

The blood on the glass where I dropped dead

The silence in the house where my mother slept

The last thing I said and the last thing I kept

It plays on the loop like the same damn song

Over and over and it's never wrong

Trapped in the memory of what I did

And not as far as all I ever did

I stop my begging, I stop my cries

I look at the ceiling of fire and lies

I'm dead and I'm done and I know that's true

There ain't no way out and there ain't no you

I sit in the ash and I let it go

I accept the burn and the endless woe

I'm riding in the heat till time don't pass

And the last thing I feel is the breaking glass

Same thing, same thing

Same truth, same truth

I'm here, I'm