Cardboard Cake

Verse 1

Barn still creaks when doors swing wide

Maw in the kitchen, apron tied

A heap of flour, eggs in a tin

She’s whistlin’ low, just lettin’ me in

Batter splatters, a soft hum in July

Cake pan clanging, loud as the sly

Paw stompin’ mud from his boots on the floor

Who’s hungry Maw? She says, I’m makin’ more

Chorus

But paw says Maw, this cake is cardboard

Dry as dust, can’t chew nothing but air

Maw’s eyes narrow, spoon gripped like a sword

“Eat it or don’t, I just don’t care!”

Eat it or don’t, I just don’t care!

Post-Chorus

Boots stompin’ on wood

Dog sniffin’ thinks it’s good

Verse 2

Maw goes crimson, puffed up proud

Pie-eyed angry, shoutin’ real loud

“Not fit for hogs, you best believe

Never again, you ungrateful Steve!”

Cake flies out, arcs in the haze

Bounces through grass, stuck in Paw’s gaze

“Fetch it if you’re hungry, or let it lay

I’m done bakin’ sweets till my dying day”

Chorus

But paw says Maw, this cake is cardboard

Dry as dust, can’t chew nothing but air

Maw’s eyes narrow, spoon gripped like a sword

“Eat it or don’t, I just don’t care!”

Eat it or don’t, I just don’t care!

Post-Chorus

Dog dashes out fast

Finds it in the back grass

Bridge

Dogs don’t judge, dogs don’t fuss

Maw watches on while paw kicks up dust

Barkin’ joy, tongue wide waggin’ grin

Best day he’s had, and he’ll do it again

Next time, next time, maybe stew instead

Or Maw’ll bake beans with her favorite bread

Verse 3

Evening falls, kitchen cooled down

Paw’s got crumbs, dog wears a crown

Belly full, tail thumping sweet

Maw’s laughter trickles down the old bare street

Chorus

But paw says Maw, this cake is cardboard

Dry as dust, can’t chew nothing but air

Maw’s eyes narrow, spoon gripped like a sword

“Eat it or don’t, I just don’t care!”

Eat it or don’t, I just don’t care!

Post-Chorus

Dog happiest in years

Licked up Maw’s cake tears

Outro

Barn doors shut, moon hangs low

Next bake-off, only Maw’ll know

She’ll put in love, or maybe some lard

Either way, cake or not, it’s the best in the yard